Sunday, March 22, 2009

Don’t cry

One of my life's great loves

So I decided to take myself seriously, and listen to my own advice. If I’m going to have faith, then I have to have faith that Secret will find herself a new owner, with as much love for her as I have, and that she’ll go on to have many wonderful adventures. I enumerated things I was procrastinating yesterday, and seriously listing Secret for sale is at the top of the list. Yesterday I put together a listing on eBay. I already have bidders! Exciting, but also nerve-wracking.

The real reason I hadn’t listed her up to this point is that I didn’t want to. I’m having profound difficulty abandoning the sailing dream, giving up on all of the memories that Secret holds. I know all adventures come to an end, but I really believed this one had a future. I had hope, even now, that I’d get back to her, and I have deep, deep guilt for letting go.

I have to let that dream go. God has plans for me, and if sailing is again in my future, I’ll find another boat. In the meantime, I can use the boat to move forward, instead of having an additional chain tied to my ankles.

So, any takers? You have a week!

2 comments:

Rodger said...

Yes, it is time! You already made the decision long ago, but I understand all too well how difficult it is to act upon it. I don't know what the boat is worth in its current location, even if the engine is now purring like a cat--but clearly you should take the highest offer and make the best of it. She cannot live down there alone another year or more...you owe her that.

Everyone I talk to, including myself, tells me it is time to sell our own boat, but I have yet to let her go in my heart.

Melissa said...

I agree it's time! I'm glad you understand how difficult it is to let go of a boat. It's like a divorce, in some ways. Or that's how it feels to me.

I know I owe her better. So I'm glad I'm making the best decision. Good luck with your own decision...